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mcbellette

Just to lighten the mood at PMDG HQ...

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1 hour ago, HighBypass said:

I have heard that the airbus fold out trays can support up to 90 kg.... :happy: 

That should just about support some of the senior f/a's US carriers have..  ;)

 

-Scott Brandenburg.

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1 hour ago, HighBypass said:

I have heard that the airbus fold out trays can support up to 90 kg.... :happy: 

Heard on a flight during the Clinton presidency era, "Ladies and gentlemen, we will be arrive at  ... soon, please make sure your seats, trays and interns are in an upright position."

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Dan Downs KCRP

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6 hours ago, downscc said:

I can join this... I'm still looking for my list of Tens Ways Women are Different from Airplanes; however, for now:

My first wife didn't like to fly, either.
— Gordon Baxter, long-time writer for Flying magazine.

That's not flying, that's just falling with style.
— Woody, from the 1996 movie Toy Story, regarding Buzz Lightyear.

There is an art … to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
— Douglas Adams, The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. (I've got the whole passage)

Landing on the ship during the daytime is like sex, it's either good or it's great. Landing on the ship at night is like a trip to the dentist, you may get away with no pain, but you just don't feel comfortable.
— LCDR Thomas Quinn, USN.

Flying a plane is no different from riding a bicycle. It's just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.
— Captain Rex Kramer, in the movie Airplane.

We have clearance, Clarence. Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?
— Cockpit crew in the movie Airplane.

The strength of the turbulence is directly proportional to the temperature of your coffee.
— Gunter's Second Law of Air Travel

When the weight of the paper equals the weight of the airplane, only then you can go flying.
— attributed to Donald Douglas (Mr. DC-n).

The bulk of mankind is as well equipped for flying as thinking.
— Jonathon Swift

In response to how he checked the weather, "I just whip out my blue card with a hole in it and read what it says: 'When color of card matches color of sky, FLY!'"
— Gordon Baxter

Instrument flying is an unnatural act probably punishable by God.
— Gordon Baxter

From Black Adder: treat your women like you treat your plane - get into her seven times a day and take her to heaven and back

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Terence Jordan

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5 years ago, a Flight Simmer asked a fortune teller to put these event in order of when they will happen

1.  The release of the LD757

2. A Tesla Roadster being sent into space

3.  The end of the world

She said, the Tesla Roadster in space in 2018, the end of the world in 3.5 billion years, then the LD757 after the next big bang.

 

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Paul Gugliotta

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Ok I'll start off the list with the difference between women and airplanes and why the latter is more favorable :biggrin:. Feel free to add some more

*) Airplanes will happily communicate with the pilot when something is wrong and most importantly won't be ambiguous about it

*) Running costs of airplanes are significantly lower

*) Airplane and pilot always arrive at the same time

*) Airplanes always have a manual on how to operate them (and airplanes are consistent on how they behave for the given actions you perform on them)

*) Airplanes are more weather resistant

*) The likelihood of survival being on an airplane that ran of fuel is significantly higher

*) Paint-jobs on airplanes are usually much faster

...........

 

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Amadeo Araujo

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– Airplanes usually kill you quickly ....
– Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
– Airplanes don’t get mad if you do a “touch and go”.
– Airplanes don’t object to a preflight inspection.
– Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
– Airplanes have strict weight and balance limitations.
– Airplanes can be flown any time of the month.
– Airplanes don’t come with in-laws.
– Airplanes don’t care about how many other airplanes you’ve flown before.
– Airplanes don’t mind if you look at other airplanes.
– Airplanes don’t mind if you buy airplane magazines.
– Airplanes expect to be tied down..
– Airplanes don’t comment on your piloting skills.
– Airplanes don’t whine unless something is really wrong.

However, when airplanes go quiet, just like women, it’s usually not good

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Mike Lab

WIN10 / I7-6700K HT ON / GTX980 / 16 GB RAM / 3 x SAMSUNG EVO 1TB SSD / 1 X WD BLACK 2TB HDD / 32"  60hz Monitor @ 2560x1440 / P3Dv4.4  No AM, Locked to 59 FPS, VSync ON, Triple buffering enabled

Process Lasso used to unload all other applications than P3D running on core 0

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On Mon Feb 05 2018 at 9:03 PM, mcbellette said:

Last one for today...

 

An A380 pilot was bragging to a Boeing 747 pilot about how great his aircraft was and how wonderfully it flew. The Boeing pilot turned to the Airbus pilot with a smirk and said, "Well, at least my plane doesn't call me a retard every time I attempt to land it."

Some of the best material yet. Love it


Terence Jordan

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