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Doc Bryant

Short Final for March 11th

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From those wonderful folks at Avweb, www.avweb.com here is: Short Final...Flight deck pun-manship:While taxiing past aircraft stands, and noticing some passengersboarding the rear entrance of a Finnair DC9, the Captain remarkedto the F/O: "Look at all those people disappearing into Finnair."My kind of guy.Then again, I figure the First Officer remarked to the Chief Flight Attendant, "This Sky's the limit...."And there was the flight crew looking for their aircraft at the gate. When asked what they were doing, they replied, "Looking for a lost Horizon!"Doc Bryant:+ I love that clown face. Honestly, it's the only reason I changed hangouts.

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Doc,Your clown icon does not show up here. Check that.Meekal:)

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There's gotta be a space before the typed smiley characters, otherwise the new forum doesn't recognize them as smilies. And where the heck are :-eek, :-hmmm and :-cool, I wonder?~Bozo Bob~The former Bozo FlyBerthttp://www.avsim.com/other/usaribbon.gif

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>Then again, I figure the First Officer remarked to the Chief >Flight Attendant, "This Sky's the limit...." Speaking of that phrase, Doc, check out my company's slogan, bottom right corner. www.sita.com I know what they're driving at, but I, along with a whole bunch of others, think it's kind of stupid, since "The Sky's the Limit" traditionally means there is no limit, then what does the opposite mean ?Dave H.Fayetteville, GA

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Dave:Your firm probably bought that slogan from the same bunch that makes up dumb ##### mission statements. Then charges wonderfully high day rates to show the Emperors their new clothes.Doc Bryant

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The mission statement generator here is an absolute gem:http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/games/index.htmlThe performance review generator ain't bad either. Here's an example:Performance Appraisal for Dr. Bryant:He was tasked with many assignments this year. It is important to note that Dr. Bryant has name recognition throughout the divisions. Our company benefits have not been wasted on Dr. Bryant. For completeness I should mention that his name is frequently mentioned in executive meetings. I find that a reevaluation of his assignments may be in order. Dan

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That is a classic. I once was given an employee review in a doughnut shop. And this was at a Fortune 200 firm.When I am consulting for a firm that posts their mission statement in public view, I raise my rates 30%. If the mission statement is one of the first three things a visitor to the company facility sees I raise them even further. It's my hazardous duty pay for dealing with stupid people.Doc Bryant

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