Possibly a collection of urban myths - but my wife emailed me this:After every flight, pilots complete a gripe sheet which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The form is a piece of paper that the pilot completes, and then the mechanics read and correct the problem. They then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humour. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, as submitted by QANTAS pilots, and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. (P = The problem logged by the pilot. S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.)P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.P: Something loose in cockpit.S: Something tightened in cockpit.P: Dead bugs on windshield.S: Live bugs on back-order.P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent.S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.S: Evidence removed.P: DME volume unbelievably loud.S: DME volume set to more believable level.P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.S: That's what they're there for.P: IFF inoperative.S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.P: Suspected crack in windshield.S: Suspect you're right.P: Number 3 engine missing.S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.P: Aircraft handles funny.S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.P: Target radar hums.S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.P: Mouse in cockpit.S: Cat installed.http://www.btinternet.com/~rob.corp/images/sig.jpg

Lol... :DHttp://home.no.net/flwold/signatur.jpg

:D This has to be one of the most popular jokes among the aviation people!Kitty MercuryCathay Pacific Virtual Pilot (CX252)

Yep, I had a feeling it wasn't new!Robhttp://www.btinternet.com/~rob.corp/images/sig.jpg

My favorite signoff that I made (It got me into trouble) was, "Changed the Nut behind the Yoke...Problem solved"http://www.ktone.org/images/FSD_ken.jpg

LOL! :-lol I must have seen this a hundred times, but it makes me laugh everytime. :-lolRyan-Flightpro08 :-cool VATSIM Pilot/ControllerZLA ARTCC Senior Controller (C-3)SAN TRACON Lead ASRC (Advanced Simulated Radar Client) Beta Tester-----------------------------My "Home Made" System Specs:Intel Pentium 4 2.2GHz ProcessorTurbo Gamer ATX Mid-Tower with 420W Power SupplyEPoX 4G4A Motherboard with Intel 845G ChipsetVisiontek XTASY GeForce4 128MB Ti4600 (Det 30.30 Drivers)512MB PC2100 DDR RAM40GB Matrox 7200RPM Hard DriveWindows XP Home Edition SP1*No CPU or GPU Overclocking*3dMark2001SE Score: 11298-----------------------------Click [link:ftp.avsim.com/library/esearch.php?DLID=&Name=&FileName=&Author=Ryan+Fretwell&CatID=Root]Here to Download my New American Eagle POSKY CRJ-200!