10 minutes ago, W2DR said:

You've just had the best sex in your life.

 

Sorry but even the worst hasn't happened for a very long time. 😌

6 minutes ago, n4gix said:

How about a system that generates the loud sound of a pump action shotgun racking a round at the push of a button? One could wear a "panic button" similar to those First Alert type devices.

I agree that most folks would run at the sound of a shotgun being racked. But, what happens if they don't? Better to have the real thing.

Edited October 25, 20214 yr by W2DR
kant spel

3 minutes ago, W2DR said:

I agree that most folks would run at the sound of a shotgun being racked. But, what happens if they don't. Better to have the real thing.

Well, I suppose one could program the second push of the button to trigger the claymore mine one has carefully installed near the front door. /snark

31 minutes ago, n4gix said:

How about a system that generates the loud sound of a pump action shotgun racking a round at the push of a button?

I have heard of a system which generates the sound of a dog barking so I suppose any kind of sound is possible. If I understand your description of the shotgun, the sound would last for one second and would not be heard outside the house.

I said once before that the Romans had the good idea of having some geese which would make all kinds of noise plus provide a lifetime supply of free eggs. Although, I suppose you wouldn't be allowed to keep geese in a residential area.

Edited October 25, 20214 yr by dmwalker

Maybe a pet leopard or puma?  Sick 'em, Kitty! 😺

11 minutes ago, W2DR said:

When seconds count, the police are only minutes away.

But, if the alarm system is flashing bright lights and making loud siren noises and waking all the neighbours, are the potential intruders going to go ahead and break in? 

9 minutes ago, charliearon said:

Maybe a pet leopard or puma?  Sick 'em, Kitty! 😺

 

Two  cat points for mentioning cats cus cats are awesome. X2 😺

2 minutes ago, martin-w said:

 

Two  cat points for mentioning cats cus cats are awesome. X2 😺

Dogs are OK, but need at least 3 walks per day!   Cats are my choice!  Time to go watch Clarice and enjoy my neighbor's liver with some fave beans and a nice keeanti!    🎃 

37 minutes ago, W2DR said:

You've just had the best sex in your life.

Perhaps you could provide a more realistic scenario.

How about a loud and obnoxious fart. 

27 minutes ago, dmwalker said:

I must say, I would prefer to have a reliable alarm system than a gun. It seems safer to have an alarm system which automatically alerts the police and probably scares off the intruder rather than having to confront an intruder inside my house.

 

Alarm systems are enough in the UK, except if you happen to live in a footballers mansion. Those guys do sometime attract more "serious" criminals and have some pretty sophisticated kit. Plus ex SAS guys. 😁 I'm not kidding, the Beckham's did.  

Ive always installed my own, tailored to just how I like them.

There are false alarms occasionally, usually due to spiders crawling inside the PIR's, but mine have been very reliable.

That is... apart from when my ex wife was pregnant with my daughter. She nudged me in the middle of the night and said "the contractions have started but don't worry, miles apart, go back to sleep". 30 minutes later the alarm system went off! 

In those days I was a fanatical martial arts fan so like Brice Lee I leapt out of bed and raced down stars ready for the dragon to whip his tail (Way of the Dragon reference) only to discover it was a rare false alarm. Went back to bed and found my ex wife having painful contractions. The shock of the alarm going off had accelerated her contractions from miles apart to only 5 minutes apart. In a panic we made for the hospital. 

The moral of the story is that if your alarm system accidentally goes off... your wife may give birth. Be warned! 

15 minutes ago, dmwalker said:

Perhaps you could provide a more realistic scenario.

OK. How 'bout you've just had the first sex you've had in 20 years? (Old guys know what I mean).

44 minutes ago, martin-w said:

 

Sorry but even the worst hasn't happened for a very long time. 😌

Hang in there. Miracles happen.

21 minutes ago, charliearon said:

Dogs are OK, but need at least 3 walks per day!   Cats are my choice!  Time to go watch Clarice and enjoy my neighbor's liver with some fave beans and a nice keeanti!    🎃 

 

Dogs are nice too, all animals are awesome. One of my daughters colleagues looks after abandoned pets. One of her German Shepard's, female, was abused by a man. Consequently the poor dog hates men and only allows ladies to stroke her. Weirdly, when she meets me she very enthusiastically allows me to stroke her.

Now at first I thought it was because the animal sensed I was an awesome human being that loved animals. But then I had a thought, maybe her sense of smell detected that my testosterone was rock bottom and she confused me with a female. 😯

You have to pick up poo though, and dogs do smell. That's the problem. 

Edited October 25, 20214 yr by martin-w

3 minutes ago, W2DR said:

OK. How 'bout you've just had the first sex you've had in 20 years? (Old guys know what I mean).

 

I don't know what sex means. I think I knew once. 🙁